"A big question as Home at Last premiered its second trailer was whether the creators had the pathetic devotion and pointer finger strength necessary to visit their various pages over and over again," said pop culture guru Ryan Sniffen, a former critic of the pair, who now hold the record for most Facebook refreshes in an hour.
"They're showing a lot of poise out there - after checking YouTube view counts 200 times the first day after uploading, Giegerich and Mize went on to refresh 224 times the following day. People are already saying these two might be the most copious clickers the online entertainment industry has ever seen." Experts agree that what makes Mize and Giegerich a true threat is their ability to click a lot plus their ability to expect illogical jumps in view count, despite steady and predictable growth."
The pair, who are by most accounts biologically human and not mindless robots , unflinchingly committed to meaningless, ill-defined metrics on third party web sites, publicly admitted that the thrill of hitting a new fan or subscriber plateau excites them so much that they check their 'numbers' every night right before bed, and again first thing in the morning. In addition, without smirking, grinning, or emitting even the smallest ironic chuckle, the 24 year old Duke University graduates said that as little as a 10% dip in view counts is enough to prompt them to re-think their entire career path.
"After view counts go down, you think that maybe the show isn't good at all," Giegerich said, blind to the dark realities of his unhealthy habit. "Every 'dislike' and negative comment replays over in your mind. They are brutally honest indicators of your show's inane, worthless content and the fact that you're going to die alone"
Giegerich also confessed to staying extremely close to his lap top at all times. He has not defecated without his lap top in six days. His over-worked computer now gets so hot that it has caused three 1/2 degree burns and one 3/4 degree burn on his left thigh.
According to sources, Giegerich and Mize are not the only web series creators with an unholy anxiety circling their Facebook, YouTube and Twitter popularity. Across LA county and the world, there are hundreds of others just like them, checking their insights, re-tweets and comments with manic glints in their eyes.
"I haven't checked my view counts in two days," one web series creator said. "I put a YouTube block on my computer and cell phone. My mom emails me updates three times daily."
"I'm really worried about my son," said this pathetic creator's harried mother, who could very well be describing a junkie's dependency on crack cocaine. "We were excited he finally produced something he wrote, but ever since the first video came out he never leaves the house. His girlfriend left him and we're frankly very worried about the dog."
These creators, like Giegerich and Mize, have extremely unrealistic expectations for their shows as well as for their careers as a whole. When shown other series and internet TV shows, Giegerich and Mize insist their show is "...much better than that crap." Caught in their numbers obsessed stupor, they do not realize they are viewing clips from their own show.
"Home at Last" is a comedy web series directed by Steve Sprinkles. The show stars William Russ (Boy Meets World) and features Jeff Lewis (The Guild). The first episode airs Oct. 25, 2011. Like us on Facebook! Subscribe on YouTube! You know we'll be checking!